Friday, June 26, 2009
"1998, that's not possible....I can't believe this is good after 6 years." She then gave a bite to someone else to try telling them she had just purchased it last week and they said it tasted fine.
It's like a little piece of Vintage Meats on my laptop, only she got paid for her work! :)
Thursday, June 25, 2009
The sad thing is, it was mango flavored and delicious. I hate mango flavored things, maybe they just have to be old...
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
I found this with no top so although it might have made it, it didn't have a chance. I would have eaten it too, it's not even vintage.
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
I am very optimistic however, that these organic shallots, which took it upon themselves to sprout so nicely in the kitchen, will grow quite well in the garden and I am going to plant them and harvest them.
Monday, June 22, 2009
Friday, June 19, 2009
But I found some in the fridge.
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Monday, June 15, 2009
Now for those who aren't aquainted with my cooking skills, I have about a 15% failure rate on my cooking projects. Not only that, when I fail, I it's with a certain rare skill that makes my failures very notable. Nonetheless I went ahead with the fudgemaking happily.
So, I put all the ingredients out. Notice the brand new evaporated milk. It was purchased specifically for this project since the others weren't safe to use.
Scooping out the Fluff showed that the corn syrup is apparently separating out of the mixture. Um, gross.
And it was happening on both.
So I put the first ingredients in the pan and turned it on high. My default temperature for cooking anything is high. I once was dumbfounded during a conversation with someone who was talking about microwaving chicken on some special setting. Again, my microwaving consists of putting something in and putting in a number (meaning I cook EVERYTHING on high). You may also remember the cupcakes I tryed to soften in the microwave.
I then set everything up, with the temperature on high, and the phone rang. I was asked to water some plants and not wanting to forget and be yelled at I went out, cordless phone in hand, to water them.
Did I mention that I also put the ingredients in a pan that was way too small? I came back in when I was told I might want to look at what I had on the stove. This was relayed in a very calm voice which didn't prepare me for what I was walking into. The stuff (fluff, 5 cups of sugar and butter) was bubbling all over and smelled like burned sugar. Uh oh. I didn't think the fudge was supposed to be brown so soon, the chocolate hadn't been added yet, but I poured the mixture into a larger bowl.
Turned the heat down to medium and began to pick the brown and black chunks of burned sugar out of the bottom.
And made fudge. I left it on the counter to cool for a while and found that we have mice.
Mice that figured out how to get a knife out of the drawer and cut a nice piece of fudge for themselves to eat. The fudge was actually not as bad as I thought it would be but it does taste like a chocolate marshmallow that was being toasted over a campfire and was blackened on the outside. Perhaps in a graham cracker it would taste like s'mores?
I think the bigger problem is how to clean that first pan.
Friday, June 12, 2009
I had dumped tomato paste, mandarin oranges, 2 cans of milk and pear nectar down the drain at once. What better way to clean the sink than to use vintage baking soda.
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
Monday, June 8, 2009
Knowing this I was not surprised to find out that this can of tomato paste had congealed blood dripping down the side of it. Looks like someone fell in again and no one bothered to clean the blood up - although there's only really enough blood for a finger to have been lost. Still gross though.
This can expired in December 2007 and smelled metallicy (this is a made-up word and I can spell it how I want) so I just put it down the drain.
Friday, June 5, 2009
It was super vintage having the chocolate chips (which expired in 2007 and didn't respond well to being frozen) and having the previously frozen egg yolks in it.
Super vintage and super disappointing.
Thursday, June 4, 2009
I had just seen a McDonalds commercial where they put whipped cream on the top of their iced coffee and thought I'd try that. I thought whipping cream would do it given the name. I took out a whisk and tried to whip it for about 5 minutes until I got carpal tunnel syndrome with no success. When I finally got tired and thought it was a bit fluffy it just sunk to the bottom of the coffee I put it in.
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
Sandwiches were an obvious choice, as were bananas (they weren't so portable though). I also tried every single processed food bar available - Luna bars, Power bars and on and on. Most of them were fairly disgusting and dry and tasted like fiber and I almost gave up. That is until I found the Slim-Fast bars. They call it a Meal Option but really they are candy bars with vitamins (and they have one that tastes like Butterfinger candy bars and Milky Way bars).
This one obviously wasn't delicious enough and I found it hidden in a bag I haven't used for years. Five years to be exact.
I tried to eat it but made it as far as one bite, which I promptly spit out. All of the chocolatey goodness was gone and eating the bar was like chewing a vitamin pill.
For reals, it was nasty!
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
The best part was the sticker on the top stating that it's your secret ingredient to rich creamy taste. Perhaps that should have been changed to 'your secret ingredient to yellow chunks and food-borne illness'.
Monday, June 1, 2009
Now everyone can see how disgustingly sticky this is. It's stickier than pudding and a bit like rubber cement. I didn't try it but it certainly gave the garbage disposal a workout...