The juice is loose...

 ...or maybe that's just how it will come out the other end.

Actually, it's totally fine, no matter what horrified animated gifs my family wants to send about it. This bottle of blueberry juice has been aged 7 years, like a fine wine, and tastes EXACTLY like blueberry juice. 

Vintage meat. For real.

So, I may or may not have a freezer full of honest-to-goodness vintage meat.

Ok, so I do.

I smoked up some vintage chicken breasts (in my stovetop smoker, due to the 17 feet of snow outside my door). One was from November of 2013, one was sometime  in 2014. I forget when exactly, since I was distracted by the 2013 date on the other one.

I just received this sassy text from home:

Here is the delicious meal a bit larger, so you can see what it is:

A friend of mine, who clearly wants me dead, recently mailed me that bottle of BBQ sauce that expired in 2007 (I'll post the expiration date later). What a perfect topping for vintage meat! Since we were apparently out of edible BBQ sauce, this got poured on top.

Those bananas in the background aren't looking too good, either...

Been a long time, been a long time...

...been a long lonely, lonely, lonely, lonely time. Both for this blog and also for the neglected tea collection in my snack drawer at work.

Looks good, right?

Lemon honey sticks and tropical tea on a cold snowy day. What could be bad about that?

In case you can't read the small print, the tea expired in Oct 2007 and the honey expired in Nov 2005. Now, the tea, I can believe. Tea leaves get old and lose flavor, but HONEY? Please... archaeologists have discovered tea in ancient tombs in Egypt--thousands of years old--that hadn't gone bad. Really.  It's scientifically impossible.

So, in my very scientific mug, I poured myself a cuppa.

And it was... not bad. While no longer especialmente delicioso, as the box claimed, it still tasted like chamomile and banana.

An interesting combination.

I polished off one honey stick while giving the tea some extra time to steep and it was completely fine. The second one had crystallized a bit, so I had to heat it up in the tea for a few minutes. Still yummy, though.

Magnet wisdom

Just make sure to photograph first, it so it can be blogged about :).

Thanks to Mel for this magnetic gem. 

Not Exactly Meat....

....but hilariously vintage.  Not only the awesome clip art, but the fact that, in computer years, this is about 50 years old.

It reminds me of this Harvey Birdman episode where the Jetsons go back to the future (which they think is the past).  I could only find it in Spanish, but if you can find it in English watch it, it brings tears to my eyes every time.

Expired dairy product and no one is the wiser

Come on--it tasted ok. It hadn't even been expired for four years (Best By date is 12/07/08). I don't know what you're complaining about.

It made delicious blueberry ice cream.

Found a peanut, found a peanut

After the macadamia nut experience, I shouldn't have even tried these. They expired in July of 2009. But, not surprisingly, I couldn't help myself.

They had been purchased for making peanut brittle, and these were the left-overs.

They tasted just like furniture polish. And, now I have this song stuck in my head!